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深圳中英翻譯【翻譯技巧】非文學漢英翻譯的注意事項
避免懸垂修飾語(Dangling modifier)
懸垂修飾語與修飾成分沒有正確的邏輯關系,往往會使讀者產生歧義。
1. 求解該方程可以得到臨界溫度。
錯誤譯法:Solving this equation can receive the critical temperature.
解析:
solving this equation 不能作為 receive 的主語。
2. 在營地安裝辦公設備時,其電動機控制盤應裝在配電室內。
錯誤譯法:When installing office equipment in the camp, its electric motor control panel should be installed in the switchboard rooms. (×)
正確譯法:When installing office equipment in the camp, install its electric motor control panel in the switchboard rooms. (√)
分詞、動名詞、不定式結構的邏輯主語必須與主句的真實主語一致。改正懸垂修飾語的方法是理順句子真實主語與分詞邏輯主語的關系,可添加或明確邏輯上的動作執行者,也可把分詞結構改為從句。
注意區分懸垂分詞和獨立主格,后者是符合語法要求的。懸垂分詞是要修飾劇中的某個成分,而獨立主格中的從句不修飾任何名詞。
獨立主格的例句:
Summer coming, we plan to go to the beach. (夏天來了,我們打算去沙灘。)
02
避免名詞化(Nominalization),盡量使用主動語態。
除表示客觀的正式法律、合同等文本外,在其他類型的文本中,能直接用動詞表達的情況下避免使用名詞或動名詞,盡量去除被動語態。
兩個翻譯原則
character應該放在主語的位置上
(The subjects of the sentences name the cast of characters.)
伴隨character的動詞一定是character的actions
(The verbs that go with those subjects name the crucial actions.)
根據這兩個原則,我們可以找到一個句子的character和action,然后分別放在主語和動詞的位置上。
① We discussed the problem.
② The problem was the topic of our discussion.
其中,we是character, discussed是action,the problem是賓語。
①句將character放在了主語的位置上,將action放在了動詞的位置上。但是②句的主語是the problem,動詞是was,不符合原則,所以②句顯得更難懂。
1. 委員會不指望能在最后期限前完成。
錯誤譯法:
The committee has no expectation that it will meet the deadline. (×)
正確譯法:The committee does not expect to meet the deadline. (√)
2. 委員會決定就實施工作場所多樣性計劃進行可行性研究。
錯誤譯法:It was decided by the committee that the issue of implementing a workplace diversity plan would need to be examined in a feasibility study. (×)
正確譯法:The committee decided to conduct a feasibility study about implementing a workplace diversity plan. (√)
注意:以下情景下可使用被動語態,避免使用第二人稱或祈使句:
動作的執行者未知,或者執行者與事件無關;
使用被動語態來強調重點;
使用第二人稱或祈使句時會使讀者感到不禮貌;
為表達客觀事實,大量使用描述性文字,如介紹產品的功能時;
常用的固定被動句型,如The records have been imported successfully.
03
避免冗余。
面向讀者的翻譯必應簡單明了,所以盡量不要使用迂回冗長的句子,應剔除不必要的詞匯。
冗余句子大多有以下特征:
使用拐彎抹角的表達,如during the course of(→during)、due to the fact that(→because);
使用累贅修飾語,造成語義重復。中文中常會出現“對應的、具體的、相關的、完全的、各種”等形容詞/副詞,翻譯時沒有必要都轉換成對應英文,可省略沒有意義的冗余詞匯。如completely correct(→correct)、sequential steps(→steps);
使用大量詞組、短語,如blue in color(→blue)、a large one(→large);
使用不必要的there be句型,如There are certain signals that are faulty. (→Certain signals are faulty.)
錯誤:The ABC000 is a piece of equipment that integrates .... (×)
The ABC000 integrates .... (√)
錯誤:In regard to men-women relationships, there is the greatest change occurring in the way men and women seem to be working next to one another. (×)
Men and women have changed their relationships most in the way they work together. (√)
04
小心由多個名詞組成的長定語。
在多個形容成分并列修飾一個名詞時,應保證修飾關系清晰易懂,避免多名詞或多形容詞的修飾方式,它們會使讀者花費精力理解修飾關系,難以找到中心詞。
1. 錯誤:the input message destination transaction code (×)
正確:the transaction code for the destination of an input message (√)
2. 不熟悉最新的相關研究文獻是童年早期思維障礙誤診的原因。
錯誤譯法:
Early childhood thought disorder misdiagnosis often occurs because of unfamiliarity with recent research literature describing such conditions. (×)
Early childhood thought disorder(n.) misdiagnosis(n.)
可改為misdiagnose(v.) disordered(adj.) thought in early childhood
正確譯法:
Physicians are misdiagnosing disordered thought in young children because they are not familiar with the literature on recent research. (√)